


(I Love You) For Sentimental Reasons

by Eustacia Vye (eustaciavye)



Category: Agent Carter (TV), Marvel 616, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: F/F, Ladies of SHIELD Week, Red Room, Women Being Awesome
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-20
Updated: 2015-02-20
Packaged: 2018-03-13 20:53:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,303
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3395975
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eustaciavye/pseuds/Eustacia%20Vye
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I love you for sentimental reasons. I hope you do believe me, I'll give you my heart.</p>
            </blockquote>





	(I Love You) For Sentimental Reasons

**Author's Note:**

  * For [wolves_and_girls](https://archiveofourown.org/users/wolves_and_girls/gifts).



> Takes place after Captain America: The First Avenger and the Agent Carter Series. It also incorporates 616-verse comic canon for Natasha. Sort of? They have retconned and reconned her history so many times, it's hard to say what they even consider canon in the first place. The title and summary comes from the Nat King Cole song, which was popular in 1946. :)

The new girl, Natalie Ross, had shoulder length red hair, bangs, green eyes, a Cupid's bow mouth that curled into easy, generous smiles, and a voluptuous body that rivaled any pinup girl's not that Peggy Carter was looking. Angie was a great gal—a good friend, a shoulder to cry on, a mouth to kiss when she got too lonely. Angie was just a spot of fun, and she was hoping to get married if the right man came along. She wanted children, a house, a fenced in yard... Peggy wasn't sure if she ever wanted those things, though for a while with Steve she had cherished the fantasy. Part of her grief wasn't just the loss of Steve but the loss of that dream just as she was starting to want it.

Natalie was a bright girl, newly hired on as a dispatcher at the phone company. She was in the front office, with the ordinary operators. She grinned so wide when she saw Peggy, relieved, and asked if they could eat lunch together. "You're the only one here I know. It's kind of scary, not knowing anyone here."

Peggy knew the feeling. Maybe that was why she agreed, even though she always took lunch at her desk so she could see what the boys were up to. But Sousa would say something to her if she asked about ongoing cases, so she likely wouldn't miss much with just one lunch away.

It was delightful to sit and not have to stake some sort of claim. Natalie was unassuming, the youngest child and only girl in a house full of boys. "Fighters, one and all," she joked. "Joined up in the army, wanted to protect me at all costs. As if I couldn't take care of myself," she added, a playful roll of her eyes telling Peggy what she thought about that.

"Well, you must if you live alone in a big city like this," Peggy replied.

Natalie's smile was sweet, a breath of sunshine in Peggy's day. "But not quite alone. The other girls give me a sense of companionship. A few let me visit their rooms, talk about movies and dance halls. Ever been to one?"

Abruptly, she remembered Steve and the Stork Club, the date that could never be. "No. No, I haven't. Waiting for the right partner."

"I like that," she told Peggy with a smile.

"What?"

"You know your worth, and you won't accept any less. You're strong that way. I don't see that too often, and it's a tough world out there."

"I've never needed help to care for myself."

Though the words were said with anger frustration simmering beneath them, Natalie all but cheered at Peggy. "Exactly! I love that. It's such a wonderful trait to have."

For a moment, Peggy felt a pleased flush run through her. Finally, to be appreciated!

"I'm so glad to have met you, Peggy. Can we be friends?" Natalie asked.

Peggy thought of warning her off, visions of dead eyes staring back at her. but reaching out to Angie had helped ground her, and she did get awfully lonely sometimes, her grief like a heavy shawl she couldn't remove.

"You mean we aren't already?" Peggy teased.

The delighted smile on Natalie's face was worth it.

***

Peggy, Natalie and Angie were fast friends in the building. Angie one night pressed a kiss to the corner of Peggy's mouth. "Sugar, you think our friend Nat might be into play like this?"

Startled, Peggy thought about it. "She looks up to me."

"Country girl like that, and a strong city girl like you? Make you a man and it's a Hollywood picture," she purred, moving to unbutton Peggy's blouse.

They both laughed at the ridiculousness of it. "Silly thing," Peggy told Angie, kissing her. "They don't have to make the femme fatale a man just to debauch the poor innocent."

Angie's breath caught as Peggy slid her hand up into the work skirt she wore. "Oh. Yeah. Mmm. You are too good at this."

"Why don't you play with Nat?"

"I might have a fella I'm working on."

"And yet you're here," Peggy chided her, nipping at her lips and pushing her fingers into Angie's panties. "And sopping wet, too, I might add."

Angie laughed breathlessly. "She's too fragile for me, Peg. I like it rough and ready." Her breath caught as Peggy took up a rapid rhythm, finger fucking her without too much fanfare. Later, she might want a little teasing and play elsewhere on her body. "Oh, yeah. Like that, hon."

"You don't think she'd do this for you?" Peggy asked, lips at Angie's ear.

Clutching Peggy's arms before she fell off the daybed, Angie smothered a moan by biting her lips. "I think," she began, whimpering. Peggy was relentless, and Angie soon fell over as her orgasm hit her. She gasped and shivered, staying quiet.

"You were saying?" Peggy laughed afterward, licking her fingers clean.

"Wench," Angie gasped, sprawled across Peggy's daybed. "I think she needs a gentle touch. To be wooed and introduced slowly. And I think that'll be good for you. The rough ones from work grind you down, and then she looks up to you like the goddess you are."

Peggy managed to suppress a sigh. "I'm no saint, Angie."

"Oh, I know that. But every girl needs someone to look at her as if she is."

"Hm. You may have a point."

"Of course I do," Angie laughed, pulling Peggy down for a kiss.

***

Natalie enjoyed the movie house with Peggy, a bounce in her step and a delightful flush in her cheeks as she talked about the movie, her hands moving animated as she spoke. "You _are_ a gem, aren't you?" Peggy laughed. "Hard to stay gloomy around you."

"Everything here has been wonderful. Not the dark, dreary place I was led to believe. Even the rough parts of town have their charm."

"See what I mean? And your smile is infectious."

Of course, that made Natalie smile. "I don't want the night to end. It's been such a perfect day."

"You impress easily, don't you?" Peggy teased.

"I had a hard life. Not enough food, holes in clothes, shoes falling apart, sleeping in a forest and huddling for warmth..." Something dark was in her eyes for a moment. "We made do. We were a family, and they made it work."

Peggy nodded and clutched Natalie's hand. "It's the way of it, isn't it?"

"But I'm glad to be here now. With you."

Though she probably didn't mean it _that way,_ Peggy couldn't help but smile and gently caress the back of Natalie's hand with her thumb. "I'm glad you went out with me tonight."

Her eyes were wide with wonder, and Natalie licked her lips a shade uncertainly. "Oh."

"Are you looking for a man to step out with?"

"Seems like all the girls are."

"Some girls," Peggy amended. "I can take care of myself. And I can definitely take care of any friends that might want to step out a time or two." Her lips curled into a suggestive smile. "In all meanings of the words."

The beautiful blush on Natalie's cheeks heightened her innocent beauty. "Is that something that happens in the city?"

"It could happen anywhere, if you find someone of like mind."

She smiled, a pretty and coquettish kind of smile, the kind of thing that would be expected to be directed at the tall men courting the girls on the first floor of the boarding house. "I suppose, being a worldly city girl now, I should see what the fuss is all about. I won't know if it's something fun or not 'till I try it, right? Like the movie house?"

Peggy laughed. "This is certainly not the same thing. A lot less public, for starters."

Natalie laughed, a girlish giggle that made Peggy wonder about the girl's innocence. Should she really be corrupting a girl just because she was lonely?

But then Natalie tugged on her hand. "We're not far now." Her eyes sparkled. "Shall we?"

In that case, how could she refuse?

***

Natalie had been in Peggy's room before, and she had been in Natalie's. Natalie had put in personal touches along the furnishings that had been supplied, needlepoint samplers and peaceful landscape paintings. She listened to a lot of classical music and jazz as well as swing and dancehall music. Peggy had never bothered to do much with her room; it was simply a room, a place to sleep and spend time before going on to the next mission. Natalie eagerly looked around her room, as if she could glean secrets from them, as if she could somehow discern that Peggy also had interest in women from the rather impersonal furniture. "I had no idea about this side of you," she said, a nervous giggle coming to the fore.

"It isn't something you have to do, you know," Peggy said, grasping her hand and giving her a fond smile. "I'm still quite fond of you, Natalie. You're a dear friend."

She nodded, bit her lip nervously, then lurched forward into an awkward kiss. "Oh! I bungled that up good, didn't I?" she asked afterward, distressed.

"Take it slow," Peggy advised her. Angie had been right. Peggy actually liked how Natalie blushed and looked up to her. "You've kissed a man before, right?" At Natalie's nod, she smiled again. "It's the same thing, you know. It's not like there's a special kiss for the ladies."

"Maybe there should be," Natalie replied tartly, the nervousness falling away. "Because you're special, Peggy Carter. More than I think you know."

That took her aback, and Natalie seized the moment to lean in and kiss her again. This one had less of the awkward, though still no finesse. That was fine, Peggy had gotten used to rough kisses and quick fucks with Angie. But Angie had also been right about this, Peggy needed the quieter, slower and more seductive type of liaison. She wanted romance in her physical affection, and that certainly seemed to be part of Natalie's allure.

Soft and gentle, with a hint of tongues touching, then Peggy grasped Natalie by the shoulders and pulled her close. When Natalie responded to her deeper kiss, she reached between them to palm a breast, abrading it lightly with her palm. She knew it would be just enough friction to get through the bra and blouse to the nipple, and Natalie gasped and arched into her touch. Peggy smiled and moved to unbutton the blouse, dipping her head down to kiss the skin as it was exposed. Natalie shivered, helped slip out of the soft fabric. She even removed the bra and helped with the button on her skirt, a low flush along her cheeks. Desiring, not sure if she should be embarrassed, not sure if it was too wanton of her to want this too much.

Oh, how lovely, lovely. Peggy thrummed with anticipation at the sight of that, at seeing the lacy concoction of bra on the floor and garters holding up her stockings. Natalie's skin was smooth as silk and pale as cream, no sun touching the areas that she caressed. Her nipples puckered at the contact of air, and Peggy suckled on them one after the other, fingers sliding to the panties to rub at her through the fabric. She was starting to get wet, and held onto Peggy for dear life as she moved to slide her fingers inside the panties to rub her clit directly. Natalie mewled softly, so softly, as if she was a tender kitten in Peggy's arms.

She also mewled prettily as Peggy slid a finger inside her and sucked hard on a breast. "Oh. Oh, Peggy," Natalie whimpered.

"Didn't know girls could do this, darling?" Peggy purred in amusement.

"Didn't know I'd want it this much," Natalie corrected with a gasp.

That was the right answer.

She kissed Natalie hard on the mouth, tongue sliding between her open lips, working another finger into her. Natalie rode her hand, clutching at her and trying to caress her through her clothes. So endearing and sweet. The kiss swallowed up Natalie's kitten cry when she came, a shiver rolling through her. Then off came the panties, and Peggy gently pushed her down onto the daybed to lick into that sweetness, to taste the scent of her arousal, to spiral her up farther than she thought she could go.

What surprised Peggy wasn't that Natalie would love having her mouth licking and sucking at her. Any girl loved that kind of undivided attention. No, it was pulling Peggy up from between her legs to kiss her, tasting herself on Peggy's tongue, and unbuttoning Peggy's blouse. "You, too," Natalie whispered roughly. "I want you to feel this amazing, too."

"Oh, pretty girl, kissing you is amazing."

Natalie giggled, that shy laugh that set Peggy's blood on fire. Had she ever been this innocent? Maybe not. But that didn't matter, not when Natalie was rising up to kiss Peggy's bared skin, unhooking her bra to lick the pert nipple, nipping and sucking gently while ghosting her fingers along Peggy's ribcage.

Wait, when did Peggy's clothes disappear? Natalie was only in black lace garters and her silken stockings, shoes lost somewhere along the way. Soon enough Peggy was down to her own stockings and panties, her heels still on. "I like that," Natalie told her with a shy smile, gesturing toward the heels. "You're so powerful that way. Like you could spear anyone that crossed you if you wanted to."

"Oh, I probably could," Peggy replied without thinking as Natalie curled her fingers down Peggy's bare stomach. "But I have other things in mind for you, Natalie."

Her touch was light, unsure, and Peggy coaxed her into touching the folds and clit, into working her up toward orgasm. Natalie nipped and licked the skin of Peggy's breasts before starting to move down steadily. Then she bent her head down and licked Peggy's clit, a light and delicate touch that teased her. But the thought of Natalie doing this, of her mouth on Peggy, was just enough to tip her over the edge and come. Natalie didn't stop, and explored her with slow licks and nips, fingers firming when Peggy gasped out "Harder. There, _yes."_

This orgasm crashed into Peggy as a surprise, Natalie's fingers pumping inside her and her tongue making lazy circles on her clit. She reached down for Natalie, fingers running through that shock of red hair, then pulled her up to kiss. Their wet centers aligned, and Peggy kissed Natalie while urging her to rock that slick sweetness against her by rubbing up against her. It was an obvious cue, one she picked up quickly, and then they were grinding against each other, gasps swallowed in their kiss.

It was amazing to come again. Usually Peggy got herself off and tumbled to sleep, fractured dreams of Steve in his dress uniform dancing with her in a bomb shelter taunting her. Then she woke alone and bereft, losing him all over again.

She felt boneless, and laughed brightly as she stretched out languorously, grinning at Natalie. "It was wonderful, darling. In case you were wondering."

Natalie blushed. "I'd guess so, the way you were reacting."

Impulsively, Peggy reached for Natalie and had her lie down beside her on the daybed. "Stay with me tonight. Neither of us will get in trouble. After all, I don't have a man in my room overnight, and we only need to say you were too tired during your visit to go downstairs. We wouldn't want you to tumble down and get hurt."

She tucked herself into Peggy's body and kissed her, soft and slow. "You'd be worth it if I did. But I ache in a completely different way."

"Mmm. Let's fix that, shall we?"

The next orgasm was just as sweet as the first.

***

Over the next few weeks, Peggy and Natalie got together whenever their schedules allowed. Natalie eagerly stayed in Peggy's apartment, learning how Peggy liked her kisses and touches, how she liked it herself. Most of the exploration was gentle lovemaking that felt like it went on for hours. Natalie worried about Angie after seeing her pleased grin at Peggy.

"I'm sorry... I didn't realize you two... That you... I wasn't the only one, I wasn't your first."

Peggy put her hand over Natalie's gently. "She and I were never serious. Angie called it scratching an itch."

"I can see her saying that," Natalie allowed.

"She's looking to settle down someday."

"You aren't. Hoping Steve will return?"

Peggy almost regretted talking about him at all, but there was a way Natalie had of talking and asking about past lovers that was so gentle and endearing. And Peggy had wanted to talk about Steve, about who _he_ was, not just the uniform and international legend.

Blowing out a breath, Peggy shook her head. "It's not that. I wonder what I'd offer. If I'd even want that. Marriage, children... feels like rustication and giving up. That I can't make it at my job and I've already set to retire."

Natalie nodded. "Doubts. They're awful. I didn't think you had any."

"Of course I do. All the time. I just never let them keep me down for long," Peggy said with a rueful grin.

"They're still working on the serum, aren't they?" Natalie asked.

"Of course not," Peggy replied. "There's no need now that the war is over."

"But it's not over. Not for everyone."

Petty caught the dark undertone in her voice, and recalled the tall, burly man that seemed to wait for her after work. He had been there again that afternoon, and Natalie's demeanor all through dinner together had been more withdrawn and down. "Are you in trouble, Natalie? Is that man from outside the office following you?"

She didn't even seem startled that Peggy knew about the man. "It doesn't matter."

"Natalie. It absolutely matters. _You_ matter to me. I care about what happens to you."

If anything, that seemed to upset her more. She was visibly agitated, and Peggy grew even more concerned as she said "You really do, don't you? You're not just pretending."

"Darling, the times I pretend are at work, so the silly men think they're better than me when you and I both know they're not."

She laughed as Peggy hoped, but it was weak, hopeless laughter. "Come, we'll talk in a more private place. You'll feel better after you do. I always feel better after we've talked."

That seemed to make her more upset, but Natalie did go back to the boarding house with her. "Not our rooms. Too many good memories there, I don't want them to be spoiled."

"Nonsense. You could use a cup of tea, some and a friendly ear."

Natalie had the tea but not the talk. Peggy tried holding, but the snuggling led to kisses. They turned open mouthed and passionate, rougher than Natalie's usual, but she moaned and grasped Peggy desperately.

"Oh, darling," Peggy said, a touch of self-condemnation in her tone. "Did I not pay enough attention to your needs? It needn't always be gentle..." She ran her teeth along Natalie's ear, making her shiver. "Trust me, love, I'll take care of you."

"I do. Trust you. I do."

Peggy wanted to ask why that would be a problem, but then Natalie's tongue was inside her mouth, her hands unbuttoning her blouse. No time to think, then. Time to go hard and fast, leaving Natalie sprawled beneath her as a quivering, boneless mess. Fingers curling inside Natalie still, Peggy sucked hard on her nipple and felt her tighten and shatter again. "I love you," Natalie gasped, nearly sobbing.

Oh. Was that why she was so troubled?

"Natalie," Peggy murmured, leaning into her kiss. "I love you, too. Did you think I did this with all of my friends?"

"But Angie..."

"It was never serious with her. We both knew that. She wants other things. Marriage, children..."

"I can't have children," Natalie blurted. "And this isn't as casual as I wanted it to be."

Cradling Natalie's face in her hands, Peggy kissed her. "We'll figure it out, Natalie. It's not as impossible as you fear it is. I promise you, if this is what you want, we can make it work."

"You love me? Truly love me? As you love Steve?" Natalie whimpered.

Peggy wasn't sure if she could or should quantify her feelings. She operated well with uncertainty. Natalie, it seemed, could not.

"Love is many things, Natalie. What Steve and I had is lost. I mourn it, I mourn him. But I'm not so lost that I can't love again, or feel that the future is gone. What we have is as serious as you want it to be, as much as you want. I won't push you. I've never pushed you." She kissed Natalie tenderly. "What do you want? To be a wife and mother?"

"I've been... Lately, even though I shouldn't, I've dreamed of being _your_ wife."

"Why shouldn't you? Because we're women? I assure you, that's not a deterrent to me."

Natalie sobbed openly at that, and let Peggy gather her into her arms and comfort her. This time the lovemaking was tender and slow, and Peggy had her curl up around her to sleep.

She woke shivering several hours later, earlier than she usually woke for work. Natalie wasn't beside her, and in alarm Peggy moved to get out of bed. That was when she saw Natalie sitting in a chair across from the daybed wearing only one of Peggy's unbuttoned blouses to cover her nakedness, Peggy's service weapon in her lap. There were tear tracks on her face as she looked at Peggy, as if she had been crying for hours.

"Natalie? If you're upset about the gun, I can explain..."

"My name is not Natalie Ross," she said. Her demeanor was calm, even if she looked to be in pain. "My name is Natalia Alianovna Romanova." Peggy blinked at the Russian name, wondered at it, and how she could have been so thoroughly taken in. "I am the Black Widow."

 _Oh._ Peggy had heard of the codename from SSR agents. That explained everything.

Peggy sat on the edge of her bed, mirroring Natalia's posture. "Are you going to kill me, then?"

"I was to get close to you, get Erskine's formula, then return."

"Which is why you said this grew far more serious than you planned." Peggy took in the tears, all shed while she had been sleeping. Those hadn't been for her benefit as the shyness and gentle action may have been. "How much of Natalie was staged for my benefit?" she asked softly, already guessing at the answer.

"Not as much as it should have been," Natalia admitted. Her lips quirked. "Even my lies were tempered by a core of truth."

"What do you mean?"

"I was born in Volgograd," she said, a slight rasp to her voice even if she didn't move a muscle. "My parents died in a fire, but my mother threw me out of a window. My foster father was part of the Red Army, and he had nowhere to raise me but with his men."

"Your brothers in the army," Peggy breathed, understanding finally what Natalia meant.

She nodded, breath catching slightly. "We... All we had was each other for a long time. They raised me, and I was a soldier before I even knew what the war was about. We starved and went without. They went with even less when I was pregnant so that I could have a little more." Her voice broke, and she had to swallow deeply and take a breath to begin again. "But it was for nothing. My daughter was stillborn. Our numbers were no match for our opponents. And then survivors were experimented on, a pathetic attempt at recreating Erskine's serum." She nodded grimly at Peggy's start of surprise. "They never stopped, Peggy. They experimented on those that they captured, those that were condemned to the gulags. I was the only survivor."

"You? They tested it on you, too?"

"It changed me in ways they couldn't predict. My reflexes are faster, I make better connections, my immune system is stronger, I don't age as quickly. They said I would never carry another child. My body would simply reject it as a parasite meant to be killed. But the same batch that I survived killed almost fifty men. And when they tried it on imprisoned women and children, all of them died as well. So they want Erskine's formula."

"What do you get in return? Your freedom?" Peggy asked gently, not condemning her in the slightest. She could see why Natalia would do such a thing. And of course the government would find a poor, lonely girl to do their bidding. Who would suspect her? Who would think that she would be capable of such things? Even Peggy hadn't seen through it, when she shouldn't have fallen for the same misogynistic viewpoint.

"No. Ivan's. My foster father. They have him imprisoned, and he's dying. I find the formula for them, and he will go free. He can get medical treatment. The man you saw, he was sent by the department to remind me that Ivan hasn't much time."

"But there are no experiments here, no formula to find." Peggy approached Natalia, kneeling on the floor in front of her.

Natalia had the gun in hand and pointed at Peggy's head with the safety off faster than she could even blink. "I'm supposed to kill you and everyone connected with the SSR if there is nothing to find. Because if they cannot have the formula, they will at least set back the intelligence agencies in this country responsible for it."

Reaching out slowly, Peggy pushed the gun aside and knee-walked closer, until she could spread Natalia's knees and wedge herself between them. "You don't want to kill me, do you? You meant it when you said you loved me. It wasn't a cover story, it was real."

"But it shouldn't be. It can't be. Ivan will die, and they will not let me leave. I know that. As far as they are concerned, I belong to them. There are too many to escape from."

"I promised you only a few hours ago that we could make this work if this was what you wanted." Peggy's gaze bored into hers. "What do you want to do? Forget what _they_ want you to do. What do _you_ want to do?"

Eyes watering slightly, Natalia's lips trembled. "I don't want to go back. But I want Ivan to live comfortably for whatever time he has left. He was a good father to me."

"And us?"

"I have no right to expect anything," Natalia whispered, blinking back tears. "I should not want anything here. I have betrayed you."

"But you're telling me the truth now." Peggy leaned in and pulled Natalia in for a kiss, dimly registering when the gun fell from her nerveless fingers to clatter onto the floor. She stroked one of Natalia's breasts, then pulled her down to kneel on the floor with her. "So what do you want, Natalia?" she asked gently. "If you could have anything you wanted?"

"You. I'd want to keep you," Natalia said, grabbing her and pulling her in for a filthy kiss.

"Natalie Ross will have to die, but I have an idea. I know some people that might be ready for a challenge like this. They're not too fond of civilian life."

"They're rusticating?" Natalia asked, smiling in spite of her tears.

"Yes. Now come back to bed, silly girl. We have work in the morning and much to plan for if we're to kill you and resurrect you as someone else."

"The girls here will know..."

"So you'll just have to live elsewhere," Peggy said in crisp tones. "Come now. No more tears, I won't have it. You're a strong woman, and those foul brutes don't deserve any more of your tears. We'll fix this, and you'll be free of them. I promise."

"How do you know I'm not lying to you now? That I'm just playing you a different way?"

Peggy hauled her to her feet then dragged her to the daybed. "I suppose I don't. But I don't think you'd lie to me about Ivan, your brothers, your baby or your entrapment." She positioned herself over Natalia, as if she could cage her on the bed with her own body. "I think you wanted me to catch you. You want me to make the decision for you."

"So what would that decision be?"

"My clothes look good on you," Peggy declared. She caressed a breast, making Natalia gasp from the pleasure. "They look even better off of you."

Natalia smiled up at her through her tears. "We're nothing more than fodder for a moving picture, aren't we?" she said with a choked laugh. "I'm the femme fatale that's fallen in love with the hero, and will betray my masters just to stay in your bed. What a stereotype."

"But that's not what you're doing now, is it? It's not just because you love me. It's because you finally think you can trust me, and that I can actually do what I mean to."

"I want to hope, Peggy," Natalia said quietly. "I've tried for weeks to work around this, but I have no options and no contacts in this country."

Peggy grinned, then lowered her body over Natalia's. "Then it's a good thing that I do."

***

The Howling Commandoes were only too pleased to reunite when Peggy promised them an unauthorized rescue mission. "Peacetime is great for the regular folk," Dum Dum Dugan had complained when they all met up that weekend, "but I for one don't know what to do with myself anymore. So if this is complicated..."

"Feel like going to Russia to rescue Natalie's foster father?" Peggy asked archly.

"Like busting up a gulag Russia?" Jones asked, frowning.

"That is exactly what would have to happen," Natalia replied. "They are holding Ivan in a secure facility outside of Moscow." She looked at them all anxiously. "Maximum security, cement block walls, impossible to get inside..."

All head swiveled toward Dernier, who simply smirked and shrugged. He replied in French, which the Commandoes had all picked up by that point. He had replied "We can take it" with utter confidence, and Natalia relaxed.

Colonel Chester Phillips was a bit harder to convince, but Peggy strolled up to the appointed meeting place at the proper time with Natalia in tow. He listened with a practiced blank face, staring at Natalia intently. "Hydra tried to steal Erskine's formula, and they killed him in the process. His lifetime of work, destroyed in an instant. No one else has been able to replicate the formula, no matter how hard they've tried."

"Perhaps not. But a flawed formula is just as dangerous as a correct one," Natalia replied. "I carry the flawed one in my veins, and I assure you, I am stronger, faster and more agile than most humans have a right to be."

Phillips eyed Peggy, lips twisting slightly. "You believe this woman."

"Absolutely. She's a spy seeking asylum."

"Why not tell those SSR guys about her?"

Peggy snorted. "They don't know how to deal with this. They'd lock her up and throw away the key, which is not the right thing to do here."

"She's got to disappear if she plans to run from the Russians. She wouldn't be coming in under Operation Paperclip because she hasn't got the proper intel."

"I'd rather not be experimented on," Natalia murmured. "It was... not pleasant."

"They were allies with the lunatic that slaughtered six million Jews and whoever else he could get his hands on that he didn't like. So no, I don't suppose it was."

While Natalia didn't outwardly react, Peggy could see the tension building in her frame. She had a protective urge, but knew Phillips would have to come to a decision on his own.

"What intel _can_ you give us?" he asked point blank.

Natalia didn't even flinch as she began to give an overview of the organization she had been coerced into working for. Peggy could see the lines of Natalie in her recitation, could see where the persona had come from. She really wasn't too far removed from Natalia, making Peggy think that yes, Natalia hadn't lied about her feelings at all.

"I'll have to get back to you on this, confer with others," Phillips finally told them.

"What do I say? They're pressuring me to produce something."

"What'd you say so far? Keep doing that."

"Their patience grows extremely thin," Natasha replied, frustration in her tone.

"I don't care. This isn't a deal that can be handed over after ten minutes. There are things we need to do on our end, if the government even thinks it's an acceptable risk. Probably is, but that's not my call to make."

"I understand," Natalia replied stiffly.

Inside of a month, however, the Howling Commandoes sent photos of Ivan in Paris at a patisserie with Dernier. A good deal of tension bled out of Natalia at that point. She had also quietly told Peggy that she could be called Natasha—"It's the diminutive of Natalia, like Peggy for Margaret. If you want."

Peggy had pushed her up against the wall to kiss her soundly. "Natasha," she murmured against the redhead's mouth, tasting the syllables. "I like it."

When Phillips got into contact with them again, a packet of paperwork was slapped down on the table in front of them. It was impossible to guess what he was thinking. He gestured for Natalia to open the packet. She looked up in confusion at the sight of the documents in front of her. "They don't trust you or your intentions. So Agent Carter and I will keep an eye on you. And the best way for that is to become my niece, Noelle Richardson."

"Do you really have a niece named Noelle?"

"No. My sister had polio, was paralyzed and in a wheelchair like President Roosevelt. She never had any kids, even though she wanted 'em. Never married, never had kids. But now she can."

Natalia looked up at Phillips with large eyes and a sad expression. "Had," she echoed.

"Polio paralyzes. It got up to her lungs. She didn't stand a chance, and refused an iron lung. Said that kids should get it." Phillips drank the rest of his coffee in a single swallow. "Died in my arms trying to breathe."

"My mother was like that. Gave me a chance by sacrificing herself."

"Could we change the name, perhaps?" Peggy asked. "Natasha is close but different enough that you'd have a piece of your past with you."

"If we did that, might as well just call her Romanoff. The point of this, Agent Carter, is to make sure no one questions her identity. Ever."

"I will take whatever name you give me," Natalia murmured. "Your government did not have to do this, after all."

"Noelle is what my sister would've named a daughter. Richard if she had a boy."

Peggy nodded her understanding, contrite. "Where would she live? It can't be at the boarding house, but I still live there. It would have to be close by."

"There's an apartment in Brooklyn," Phillips replied. "You'll recognize the neighborhood. A lot of immigrants, but a tight knit community." Peggy wondered if Brooklyn was his way of being kind, or if there had simply been leftover safe houses. "As for a job, you're good with languages and you're clearly not stupid. You're going to be my new assistant as we process paperwork."

"Doesn't your government worry I will turn on you?"

"Did you think yours would be the only eyes on those documents?" he asked archly.

Natalia nodded, unsurprised. "So when do we start?"

"Natalie Ross is going to be in a horrible automobile accident next week." He nodded grimly at their looks of shock. "One of our docs will pronounce you dead at the scene, do up the paperwork to kill that identity. Meanwhile, Noelle will finish up her secretarial training program and start working for me in three weeks." He turned to Peggy. "During those two weeks, you're going to conveniently have a family emergency and keep an eye on her."

"So we're distantly related now?" Peggy asked in amusement.

Phillips snorted. "Hardly. You're just going to pretend to be Noelle's best friend."

No need to pretend, but Phillips didn't need to know about the particulars of their relationship.

"I understand," Natalia said with a nod. "I'll do this."

"'Course you will. Your only other option is to go back to Russia, where they experimented on you. At least in this country, anything done to Steve Rogers was with his consent." With that pronouncement, Phillips rose and nodded briskly. "Ladies. Follow the directions to the letter, and we'll have this tied up tight."

Once the two of them were alone, Peggy murmured "Noelle" to test the name. It felt odd and unfamiliar, though it was a strong tie to Phillips.

Natalia smiled softly. "We'll get used to it. And you can call me Natasha when we're alone." She tilted her head in Phillips' direction. "He reminds me of Ivan."

Peggy reached across the table and grasped her hand. "To a future together," she promised.

Her smile broadened and she nodded. "To the future."

Somehow, Peggy didn't think the future looked bleak anymore.

The End


End file.
